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Jared is starting to learn cursive handwriting in school. It's supposed to be easier for dyslexic kids to learn cursive, so we're blessed that the school he's in has all kindergartners writing in cursive by December. 

I thought this would be a good time to demonstrate how Jared writes his name.

Normally, it looks like something like this:

Occasionally, he'll get a few letters backwards and add some random things:

Today, it looked like this. At first I thought he wrote a backwards J and then attached a D to it, but quickly realized that is his cursive D starting off his backwards name. When I asked, "What is this?" He said, "It's my name. It says Jared."

I can't even begin to understand why his brain does this. Yes, I've been told by the experts, but it's still hard to fathom. Most days it's fine, but when I see this it feels like a ton of bricks just fell on me. This is his life. This is his battle.

I cry out to the Lord, I plead for the Lord's mercy. I pour out my complaints before him and tell him all my troubles. Psalm 142:1-2 (NLT) 

A Better Understanding

Today I read the article, "Gifted Dyslexics: More Common Than Most People Think". It shares about famous folks with dyslexia and helps people better understand the condition. So many people don't understand it. I've talked about it  during Jared's soccer matches... because I worry he might kick it to the wrong goal (and he has not!) I think people question that theory, as they assume dyslexia just refers to reading. Here are a few nuggets I especially liked in this article:

When most people hear the D word, they think reading. "But reading difficulties are just one part of this condition," according to Fernette Eide, M.D., a leading learning specialist and physician who, with her husband, Brock Eide, M.D. M.A., runs the Eide Neurolearning Clinic in Edmonds, Washington. The clinic specializes in the evaluation and care of children with school and learning challenges. As they write in their book The Mislabeled Child (Hyperion), "Children with dyslexia often struggle not only with reading but also with handwriting, spelling, oral language, math, motor planning and coordination, organization, sequencing, orientation to time, focus and attention, right-left orientation, auditory and visual processing and memory."

"They stretch the boundaries," Brock Eide says. "When they read, they can't just automatically match sounds and letters, so they use contextual cues and problem solving and no one may realize there's a problem." Dyslexic kids grow so good at problem solving, at finding alternative ways to compensate for the fact that they can't read, that they become expert brainstormers. "Dyslexic children often become some of society's greatest thinkers," Brock Eide says.

And my favorite line - "...don't be so heartbroken by a diagnosis like 'learning disability' that you fail to see a gift."

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17 (NIV)

Fantastic News!

I just received some extraordinary news!  After meeting with Jared's principal and teacher this afternoon, I am elated.

As I mentioned previously, Jared will be part of an intervention program at school. That intervention program, of course, costs money. I was not aware of the cost until our meeting today. It's $2,160. "Well, this is why I have my new job", I thought. However, here's the exciting part:
"Because the program is new and the two Academic Language Therapists are still under supervision, each therapist must obtain a student in which reports must be sent to a supervisor along with a few video tapings of the Therapists teaching a student. If the aforementioned would be allowed with Jared (reports being sent to supervisor and video of therapists teaching Jared), the fees would be exempted. Please know that all personal information direction related to Jared and his family would be anonymous. The therapists are being scrutinized, not the student."

After hearing this, I must say that the news about the $2,160 falls short of the best news in this. The therapist has ONE student. Just ONE. Her future depends on how well they both do. It's like he's the subject of her PHd or something! Can I add another exclamation point? One student! Reports on ONE student! I had tears in my eyes. This means someone is as concerned with his progress as I am! This means that he's her "grade" for the entire year! (Okay, that's enough exclamation points... but you get how excited I am.)

“Be glad, people of Zion, rejoice in the Lord your God, for he has given you the autumn rains because he is faithful. He sends you abundant showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before.” Joel 2:23 (NIV)

Calming My Inside

Every day, my insides are a mess. I couldn't imagine how a parent who doesn't constantly wonder how her child is doing at school feels inside. I  dream of that peace. I can't seem to let my anxiety go. I'm waiting for some horrible wall to crumble or ax to fall or something. Sometimes my angst is a little debilitating. I look at his schedule to see where he would be at that time. I sit on the floor. I pray. I get a little emotional, as I don't have control over any of this and I just want him to be okay. I just want him to feel normal. I just want him to want to be at school... at least most of the time.  

I can't stand feeling this way. I can't stand that I'm holding on to something, instead of letting it go, knowing God is in control of this. Jared is doing well at school. In fact, I'm almost shocked at how well he's doing. His teacher wrote me an email that said, "He has been doing very well with first time obedience, just a reminder is all that he needs most of the time, then he looks at me to listen. I would ask that you remind him to be quieter at rest time so he can relax and get refreshed for the rest of the day."

I never dreamed I'd have a child with so many challenges. I still don't know how this is all supposed to work out with him in such an advanced academic school. Every day I cover him in prayer and hope that he has an okay day.  Since I haven't been home schooling him the past few weeks, his APD tendencies seem to really shine, including repeating questions over and over. He also seems more insecure, because we're not working one on one with phonics drills. I guess I just really don't know how to help him now that he's in school full time. I want to make sure I'm doing everything I can, as these years of his life are so critical.

So those who rely on faith are blessed along with Abraham, the man of faith. Galatians 3:9 (NIV)

It's Hot!

Y'all, it's hot out there. Hot. Hot. Hot. We're trying to keep my never-standing-still boys hydrated, but this heat is saturating! Jared is 100% healthy this week and is doing great in school. Last Wednesday, he received a perfect weekly folder score. He's only received approximately 3 of those in 2 years! I'm hoping he does well in tomorrow's folder too. And, of course he's doing well in soccer. Here are some posts from today's practice.

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!  Philippians 4:4 (NIV)

FM System?

I stumbled across a goldmine. Well, I believe it's a goldmine. I found a teen with APD's blog. It's good. And, she's linked to other really cool APD blogs. I can't believe I didn't find these sooner. After all my months of trying to find "good" ones, I guess I had to find one to find the others. I haven't even begun to read everything, but can't wait to learn some more perspective from these kids with APD.

One thing that tends to come up in these blogs, or APD talk, is an FM system. Since I haven't written a blog entry on this subject, I thought I'd do it now. FM systems are one option for helping eliminate background noise in the classroom. I have always wondered if Jared would benefit from this. He would wear some headphones and his teacher would have a small mic and he'd hear her more clearly. It's not for everyone. If Jared doesn't have difficulty with speech clarity, it might not work for him. We don't really know his specific APD profile right now, as he's so young. But, then again, I think... maybe this is the time to try something like this out... while he's in the younger grades so he doesn't feel as "different". Who am I kidding? Wearing a hearing device will probably make him feel awkward in any grade. Or, will it?


I found this blog entry for a sweet teen who wrote about her experience with it: "You’re thinking 'isn’t it awkward or embarrassing to have to go to the front of the classroom and make the teacher wear a microphone and you have to wear earplugs? What do the other kids say?' Well, yes. It is awkward and sort of embarrassing, but I’m getting over that. I try not to think about it during class, because if I let that bother me too much, it would be worse than not having it at all and the FM system would be hurting me rather than helping me. Yeah, I’ve had people make some comments to me and made me feel bad about it, weather they meant to or not. But I’m not letting it bother me too much. If I did, then like I said it would be hurting me more than it would be helping me." I like her perspective!

I'm going to continue to research and see what age is best to possibly try this out

Moses replied: “It is not the sound of victory, it is not the sound of defeat; it is the sound of singing that I hear.” Exodus 32:18 (NIV)

Dumb, Stupid, Loser

I could not have found this video at a better time! Today, Jared struggled so much with wanting to go to school. He says it's too long and he can't seem to focus. And, by the time he was at soccer practice tonight he was calling himself "dumb" and a "loser". Where in the world does he get that?! A loser? I don't even know where he heard that word and why he called himself that! {crush} {shatter}

I found this video posted on an APD page. I like it. Some of the comments were kind of sad, as dyslexics were trying to read the words going across the screen (something I probably would have chuckled about in the past, but now that my kid has it, my mind goes straight to, "He probably will never be able to see words flash across a screen like this." {crush} {shatter}).

Here's a quote I read today: ..."Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." — Albert Einstein (who is believed to have had some sort of processing problem...)

No one can know a person's thoughts except that person's own spirit, and no one can know God's thoughts except God's own Spirit. 1 Corinthians 2:11 (NLT)