It's Too Hard

This was a rough week back at school for Jared. He mentioned, on many occasions, that he didn't like school and didn't want to be there. We knew he really enjoyed his Christmas vacation, so we started working with him early in the week on his scripture memorization. Ray worked with him nightly and I worked with him in the mornings. 

Today, as we were reviewing the verse in the car, he could not get it. And, let me tell you, I would not have won any awards for motherhood either. If you were driving anywhere near my car, you would have seen me periodically pull out his favorite stuffed red dragon and hold it out the window, threatening to throw it, while my little boy was begging me to not throw his favorite "lovey". {I can't even believe I just admitted my heinous crime to the world} Don't worry. The dragon is fine. I eventually got my frustration in check and apologized for my ridiculous actions. I was just so sick of hearing, "It's too hard!" My reaction is, "Well, you know what? It's ONLY going to get harder." He doesn't get it.

Speaking of anger, he had an angry week. In fact, I've never seen him so angry with things. I knew it had to do with school and when the window-dragon-throwing-crazy-momma morning happened this morning, it all made sense. He told me he couldn't do it. He wasn't smart enough. He told me his brain wouldn't work. I haven't heard words like those in months, so I wasn't prepared for them. 

After I dropped him off, the tears started falling for my child. I knew that Bible verse was hard. I knew why he could only say, "We know that all good things come to those called according to His purpose". APD symptoms clearly state that kids can only remember the first and last words they hear. Our Christmas vacation was over and APD slapped us in the face this week.

Ray and I wondered if we should get him back in to see Dr. Champagne ASAP. We know that it's a lot to ask kids to sit in entire days of school and then go to hours of therapy, so it's never our first choice. However, we know that he'll never be able to keep up in this school! We didn't have to spend very long thinking about it because God arranged a divine appointment with Jared's principal this afternoon and I told her our concerns. She is having a formal meeting with me next week, and told us to just keep encouraging him because he needs confidence. {nope - didn't tell her about my 'encouraging' dragon moment this morning!} My favorite part of the conversation went something like this: "He shouldn't have to memorize the exact verse like the other kids do. I didn't know his teacher was making him do that. There's no way he can do that with his APD. Our goal at this school is to make sure kids understand the verse, so they can hide it in their hearts. As long as we make sure he knows what the verse says, he should be fine." Whew! And, on that note, I'll leave you with the verse.

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. Romans 8:28 (NKJ)